for the most part it was ok.  at first my mom thought i was doing the vegan thing just to cause her trouble, and be difficult, self-righteous and get a lot of attention.  wonderful.  most of the time it was just people asking me questions and me giving them answers, to tell you all the truth i didn't really want to talk about it. 
but after i cooked her a few things, and explained to her more of the benefits of the lifestyle she started to come around a little.
for a barbecue during the retreat weekend i made humboldt honey's grilled spicy fruit skewer things, and they turned out wonderfully, everyone loved them! i also grilled some zucchini
then my mom wanted to have a family dinenr to celebrate my upcoming birthday, and i asked her if i could cook.  so i made lemon-basil baked tofu, and stirfried it with green beans, broccoli, cashews, and rice noodles.
instead of a birthday cake i cut up a watermelon and froze it, and we ate it with coconut milk ice cream. yum!

my dad did get me a pair of pearl earrings for my birthday, but he had purchased them a while back, and put so much thought into picking them out that i didn't even care.  they are really high quality expensive fancy pearls, so i will probably not wear them that often anyways. 

and i ate at wheel of life in irvine, as per suggestion by several folks on here.  taco loco in laguna beach has a lot of vegan options.
we did go out to dinner with some church people at a place called the daily grille, and thank goodness they had a gazpacho special, because i couldn't eat (or even modify to make fit) a single thing on the regular menu.

anyways, thanks all for your support and ideas preceeding this trip folks, you really helped boost my confidence going into this.