1. margarine (Is smart balance vegan? does cooking with it destroy the omega 3s?)
Earth Balance

2. egg replacer (for baking & recipes, not omelettes!)
Ener-G; but you don't really need one.  Most things are fine without

3. cheese (I've bought some "veggie" cheese before, then read the label & realized theres "milk derivatives"  in it, what sense does that make?!)
Don't bother, most really suck.  Try lady dragonfly's chez sauce
http://vegweb.com/index.php?topic=7126.0

4. ice cream, or other frozen treats
Soy Delicious Mocha almond fudge, yum

5. pancake mix
skip it, pancake batter is easy with a few basic ingredients (nothis specifically vegan)
http://vegweb.com/index.php?board=218.0

6. yogurt/sour cream
Silk makes good yogurt, not sure about sour cream

I prefer organic if possible too. I always feel like an idiot when I go to the store & sit there, reading labels, trying to figure out if theres any animal products, then trying to figure out if what I'm looking at would even taste good!

Honey, if that makes you an idiot, then we're all screwed  :D  You just asked a question to the biggest group of label readers on the planet.  Just bring a chair and enjoy the stares!  How else are you supposed to know what's in the food you're eating?  Read away!

1. Smart Balance LIGHT is vegan, but not the original. (And yeah, cooking with it would destroy the Omega 3-s.) I've never seen the Organic one, but apparently it's ok too, as TinTexas said. Most here will recommend Earth Balance-- it's relatively inexpensive, organic, and delicious. (Yay!)
2. Egg replacer-- the one commercial one available is Ener-G; some people like it, some don't. It just depend what you're using it in. I'd honestly hold out on getting a box until you have a specific recipe that calls for it-- there are a lot of much cheaper alternatives that work as well, sometimes better. I've personally had good luck with blended silken tofu, applesauce, banana, pumpkin puree, and flax "eggs."
3. As far as vegan cheeses go, most people have allegiances with one brand in particular: Follow Your Heart Vegan Gourmet, which comes in 3-4 different flavors, and is really tasty. There are a few others out there, but that's the one that seems to be easiest to find. A word about soy cheese: now matter how good a substitute it is, it won't fool your tastebuds, especially if you just quit dairy. I'd hold off on any cheese-analogs for a few months.
4. There are some really good Ice "cream" alternatives out there, but again, people vary in opinion. I've only had So Delicious, and it's excelllent, albeit a very "light" tasting substitute. I liked it a lot, but I hadn't had iced cream in a year and a half, so I was easily swayed. (Hehe.) Some of them are more decadent; I've heard Double Rainbow products get great reviews. We have entire Topics in here devoted to ice cream flavors, so browse around when the craving hits, you'll find what you're looking for.
5. Pancake mix... hmm... I know the new Bisquicks were at last glance vegan, but they also have some random chemicals/preservatives that vegans aren't generally fond of. I know there are some pre-made mixes (check with your local healthstore), but I haven't personally tried any of them. Luckily, there are quite a few recipes for scratch pancakes and waffles in here that take only a few minutes to put together, and a lot of them are whole-grain, which is always a plus.
6. I've found one brand of soy yogurt that I've liked, and that is Wildwood Plain (unsweetened). I don't like sweet junk in my yogurt, and a lot of brands are overly-sweetened to account for the non-dairy flavor.

Other than that, don't be afraid to try new stuff, exotic items, ethnic fare-- it's all fun! Vegan food is quite diverse, so just keep your eye out for stuff that looks good. Welcome to the boards!

Yeah, don't feel silly at all about reading labels.  I happily read labels in the store, and I think everyone else is an idiot for not knowing/caring what they are putting in their bodies!

Soy Delicious is so yummy!  And it doesn't have a lot of strange ingredients either. 

Someone referred me to this for egg replacers once: http://www.theppk.com/veganbaking.html
Awesome advice (and site)!  But I usually only use "eggs" if I am making something for someone else and I want it to be perfect.  Otherwise, I can't really tell.

I've given up on vegan cheese really.  I don't really like it too much, and it usually has more weird ingredients than I care to find in a product.  I use Dragonfly's sauce too!  It's awesome, and has good old regular ingredients.

I've noticed that my Trader Joe's is finally carrying soy yogurt (flavored) so I buy that every once in a while.  But you can make your own by mixing maybe a few cups of soymilk (with a decent amount of fat) with a heaping tablespoon of *active* soy yogurt, and putting it in a warm spot for 10-24 hours.  (I prefer 24).  If you start with flavored yogurt, and use truly unflavored soy milk, you will end up with unflavored yogurt, especially if you continue the culture into a second batch.

I get mine at Sunflower Market (if you live in Arizona, New Mexico, or Colorado and haven't checked out Sunflower, do so today! It's my all-time favorite grocery store!) I haven't seen Whole Soy elsewhere, but maybe I just wasn't looking at the time.

Sunflower is in Nevada too--I do my weekly grocery shopping there!

margarine=Earth Balance

egg=I prefer flax, tofu, banana, applesauce (depending on the recipe) to a commercial egg-replacer.  But Ener-G works ok in a pinch.

ice cream=So Delcious hands down.  I didn't like Soy or Rice Dream at all.  If you feel really indulgent (and have a large pocketbook), try the So Delicious Purely Decadent line.

Yogurt=Silk is really sweet, though some people like their yogurt that way.  I prefer Whole Soy and unfortunately haven't had the opportunity to try Wildwood. Buy a little container of each if you can and figure out which one you like best.

Sour cream=Tofutti.  They make one that contains hydrogenated oils and one that does not contain hydrogenated oils--I think that it tastes just fine without.

Cheese=when I first became vegan, I tried a brand of vegan cheese (can't even remember which one, maybe Veganrella?).  It made me want to puke and I'm scared to try any other brand, though many seem to like Follow Your Heart.  I prefer my own cheese sauces made with nutritional yeast (though I think you mentioned your husband doesn't like it :( too bad, it is my favorite vegan thing in the world, maybe keep trying it out on him in things like cheesy lasagna and cheesy beans and cheese enchiladas--both on this site).  Try out Dragonflys Bulk Dry Uncheese mix too.

Pancake mix=I have to agree with the others, it is sooooo simple to make pancakes from scratch (hardly takes any time at all).  To cut down on time, you can even make your own "mix" of dry ingredients ahead of time and then just add liquids when you are ready to make pancakes.

Welcome to the site!

Elizabeth

I really like tofutti ice cream too, very tasty.  There is a product called "better than sour cream" I think it is by tofutti also.  I think it's really good.  I made the twice baked potato recipe from this site using it and the omnis loved them!  They alos make "better than cream cheese."  Eh, that's just so-so.

Soy Delicious chocolate peanut butter....MMMM!  :)

1. margarine: Earth Balance (seems like what most of us use thanks to the lack of hydrogenation... plus, it's tasty =))

2. egg replacer's a real trick. I use cornstarch and water (1 tsp. mixed into 1 oz. water) for cookies and batters for frying, and I use applesauce (1 oz per egg) for fluffier things (cake, brownies, soft cookies, etc). In the case of banana-something (pancakes, bread, muffins, cookies), I just omit the egg replacer because apparently banana does the trick. I've used Ener-G before, but I don't think it's all too special; it's pretty much just potato starch and leavenings anyway...

3. Follow Your Heart makes block cheese that melts and is the best I've tasted. I've seen another brand,typically purple with Vegan in big white letters (I think the actual brand name is soymage), but it's not as good as Follow Your Heart. But I use their parmesan 'cause they're the only ones who make it  :P Anyway, I've used both cheddar and mozzerlla Follow Your Heart and they're both darn good (I've used it in nachos, grilled cheese, cheese burgers, and pizza).
A cheaper vegan cheese is made by Tofutti (slices; not the cream cheese), but I haven't been able to find it lately. It worked fine in pizza.

4. Purely Decadent by soy delicious is the beeeest ever for me (any flavor), but Soy Dream chocolate brownie, Tofutti cuties, and Soy Delicious cookies n cream (quart) are my occasional indulgences too... Soy Delicious has pretty exclusively organic ingredients, not sure about Soy Dream or Tofutti, though.

5. I have abandoned pancake mix ever since discovered the Easy Pancakes recipe on here (the one that involves letting the batter sit and mixing again) as well at the Banana Pancakes recipe that's got all those delicious photos. They're both easy enough.

6.  Tofutti makes a sour cream (I forget the specific name), and it no longer has hydrogenated oils. Dunno about organic, though. It's reeeeaaally good, tho.
I've not been an avid yogurt-eater at any point in my life, but there are three flavors of soy yogurt at Trader Joe's (if you've got one near you) that are good... especially the peach. No plain/vanilla yet, though.

I almost bought the Tofutti ice cream today after reading this thread. But the package was too big. If I didn't like it, I'd throw it out. I wish I could get just a sample.

I stay away from vegan cheeses. I haven't met one that I like. So I avoid cheese all together. So do my two other vegan friends (unless they make their own).

On thing about soymilk. You mention you buy Silk. I know a lot of people do and like it, but I have found Silk to be one of the less tasty soymilks out there. Definitely experiment with all the non-dairy milks (soy or not) that are out there, you might just find one that you like a lot more. I like Organic Valley, Vitasoy unsweetened, WildWood brand, and Pearl (this one's more expensive, but it's yummy!!).

1. margarine (Is smart balance vegan? does cooking with it destroy the omega 3s?)
Earth Balance, but I cook/bake a lot with oils and only use margarine for special recipes or a treat.
2. egg replacer (for baking & recipes, not omelettes!)
It depends. Replacing eggs is a whole discussion in itself. Some people say an egg replacer isn't needed, but I would say that's only the case for recipes that are already "veganized." Look at baking recipes on this site and see what is used. Baking from recipes actually makes things a whole lot easier in the beginning. To answer this, possible egg replacers include: Ener-G egg replacer powder, "Wonderslim" liquid egg replacer, blended silken tofu, mashed banana, ground flax, cornstarch/arrowroot/other starch, soy yogurt, and probably a whole list of other things people have found to work. Which one to choose depends on what you're trying to make.
3. cheese (I've bought some "veggie" cheese before, then read the label & realized theres "milk derivatives"  in it, what sense does that make?!)
Trial and error. I like Follow Your Heart, but it doesn't taste like cheese to me. I just use it as a "fancy ingredient" in cooking rather than "just like cheese," if that makes sense. Recently I have read a lot of people rave about "Sheese" on their vegan blogs. I haven't tried it myself yet. My favorite vegan "cheese" is actually vegan parmesan because it comes pretty close to the real thing and is nice in most recipes calling for real parmesan.
4. ice cream, or other frozen treats
Here are my favorite brands: So Delicious (especially their "creamy raspberry" bars), Purely Decadent, Double Rainbow (especially mango-vanilla!), tofutti cuties (I like their new strawberry swirl kind), Celestial Seasonings (I hope they still make these, my favorites are imperial white peach, and the hazelnut fudge or whatever it was called), and Soy Dream. Also go for the sorbets at your local market (read the label, almost all sorbets are vegan).
5. pancake mix
Can't help you with that, I make pancakes from scratch.
6. yogurt/sour cream
I know someone already mentioned it but WILDWOOD!! I have actually never tried any WildWood product that I didn't like. Just the opposite. All (!) of their products that I tried have been the best of their kind (tofu, sour"cream" when they still made it, soymilk, soy yogurt, vegan mayo, etc.). If you are looking for unsweetened plain soy yogurt (for something like a dip for example, where sweet/vanilla flavored would not work at all), I believe WildWood is the only company that offers actual plain soy yogurt. It's called "plainly plain" I believe, and they sell it in individual-size or large containers.
For fake sour cream, I buy any that is non-hydrogenated. Sometimes I will buy a tub that is very off-tasting (happened twice with tofutti brand in the past), but ususally that means it's a bad batch, not the product. I found them all to be very similar, and liked them all.

And don't feel bad for reading labels. That's how it starts out, but it does get better. I used to read a LOT of labels and sometimes feel very uncomfortable an inconvenienced doing it, but now, 4 years down the road, I hardly ever read a label because I know most products that I buy regularly, and I don't buy a lot of processed foods anyway. I usually only resort to label reading nowadays when someone offers me something I have never seen before or if I spot a new item at the store that seems interesting.